he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
