Don't you send me to vm
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
