shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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