she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
ok first of all what the fuck
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
He has the fingertips of a God
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
