We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
should my penis look like a turkey
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Randomize
