if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
