Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I have already put on my inside pants.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
