That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
