sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I got her a Nickelback box set.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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