The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
