I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
The air was thick with penises
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
