Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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