And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
