She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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