You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
