drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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