i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
love makes seman taste better
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize