Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
