I must be too annoying 4 u.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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