The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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