the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
