sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Randomize
