sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
