Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
