I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
