Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
