Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
