They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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