just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
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