But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
