Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
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