She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize