i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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