somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
