i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize