I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
