Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
