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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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