I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
