Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize