I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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