Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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