i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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