What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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