11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
