You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
