Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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