I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
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