We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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