When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
